Well....if I didn't predict my own fate by making light of these contestants obvious lack of employment. But my job less is your joy gain because there's literally no excuse for me to miss episodes. Like my contestants, "I'm taking some me time." As such, I'm giving you what you want. Hard hitting, live action, play coverage of the world's most dis…

Well what terrible timing to fall off a regular schedule with releasing this program - someone shared the show and I got hundreds of unique IP addresses streaming this hot, intense action in one day. Then life happened and I shit everywhere and missed April. But that's neither here nor there as today we talk tacos and as usual - are let down and tu…

Your best friend is back. Your best friend is taking you gambling. Craving a weekend in Vegas? Well how about an episode of Chapped centered around some nasty ingredients and a few contestants obvious gambling addictions in this "Casino Royale" themed episode. Listening highlights: Long wieners The additive properties of the color wheel My cat's po…

Welcome to the New Year. Or, if you are a like us, welcome to the beginning of the end of the lunar year. Just like the old gypsy foretold, today is a day where we take it back to our roots. The original Chopped kitchen, regular shitty cooking and the usual crew loaded up with Botox. Some crucial show highlights: Rony's many special gifts. Disrespe…

What did you want? Did you want DOGS? Well, you got them with this fun episode of Chopped where there are cooking food for a dog. They also have to make human food but not surprisingly, the dog and his enjoyment takes the cake (no culinary pun intended). Highlights: Surface piercings My light and my bushel Amanda's jacket Chris' dog's dick --- Send…

Trigger warning: this is an episode. Also, I chose to go rogue and not duck the volume of my reactions because I wanted you to know it is real. There are some very serious issues discussed this week. Issues like: Nico's beauty but also his receding hairline. Mr. Peanut from the front 3D puzzle War --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spo…

Wow, it's like opening up a diary and seeing that I've been in a coma for 2 months. But instead of a coma, I was living the American dream dumping my unemployment money into a new business. But enough about me, let's talk about you. Let's talk about this action set in a big rustic warehouse with a hook for a hand judge and some gold nails that make…

What a great way to resurrect from the dead but with an surprisingly lively episode. Warning - I do have a new cat and feel free to jump ahead a full 2 minutes when you hear me answer "The Call." Highlights: Michelle's face Michelle's lips 90's DJ's Prayer beads --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

AUDIO WARNING: THE HOST IS REALLY INTO THIS EPISODE AND IT GETS LOUD AND ROWDY. If you are listening in headphone, be forewarned the surprises are abundant and worthy of each exclamation. Hot Pockets: -It's still Marc and Marc -Double ball sheen -The turtles are back -Fedoras --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chap…

Never has a truer statement been said - "And we're back." It's been a minute. I took some time to mourn the passing of my dear baby cat boy Mr. Jackson. Now that I'm back, Martha Stewart is our host, I guess. Listening highlights: -It's another Marc V. Marc -Mama Martha -Round Bread -2 minutes of moderate feedback between 15:30 and 17 --- Send in a…

Is this a Worst Foot Forward Products crossover? Because we are inventing some revolutionary shit here today! Hightlights: Invention Curtains America's Cutest Chef Tears --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message

Greatest of All Time? No. This time GOAT stands for the animal, for whom we have no famous association besides a symbol of hell. So, if you know of any famous goats, please let us know. Get your hand turtles out, because we are gunna have a smashing good time. Listening highlights: Scooby Doo Lentils and their worth compared to a life Pee Pee Pipel…

This will be the last time! Go to anchor.fm/lisadank for the rest! Shouts out to my djinn Skiskerwah and archangel Mitzrael for joining me for this hot as lava play coverage of America's favorite knife making reality TV show, Forged in Fire. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

That morning sunshine sure brought out a lot of fuck words this week. What else would you expect for a totally bonkers, yet obviously pre-planned out finale, of the Grudge Match. Who gives a shit about parts 2 and 3. Talking points: Marc v. Marc A long noodle shot The curse word bleeded out round the world A paternity twister BROUGHT TO YOU BY WORS…

FROM THE MAKER OF CHAPPED - NOW AVAILABLE AT ANCHOR.FM/LISADANK --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message

And we're back on track-lemore featuring a new episode with a totally acceptable amount on technical issues. Talking points: Macklemore's mustache and its impact on fair skin red haired men everywhere Blood The Fart Funnel Bringing Business Casual Back to the Kitchen --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/messa…

After a tragic lost episode and then a second episode taken to its grandpa's house, finally, to end 2020 we have Episode 20. Not without it's sudden collapse of audio quality in the last three minutes. My shoulder hurts, my eyes can't see but who gives a shit. THIS IS CHOPPED. Talking points: 2 Wedding rings Trina - Is she the baddest bitch? Gay Pr…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MU-LWmrwpp4 RIP EPISODE 18 - CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE TRIBUTE Dear Listeners, It is my grave fortune to announce that this week's recording became so corrupted by my recording software that continuity was lost, and out of respect for you, my dear listener, the jokes will be lost too. As a result, please enjoy a brief t…

Like Jake Paul fighting Nate Robinson, one of our contestants is set on proving that white can fight. I don't know if he wins the episode but I do know there is a real special guest (three guests, actually) that make the desert round worth sticking around for. Talking points -A near fatal error -Michael Ian Black -Oats --- Send in a voice message: …

Jokes are back! In a classic two-take episode, we embrace challenging topics largely centered around blood and that sweet sweet hog. I missed a great opportunity to make Puddle of Mud reference but other than that, we've got a really great show this week. Talking points: - My friend, muralist, Kiri Leigh's father Arthur - I give out the shows phone…

Put me on this fuckin' show. We see more gang affiliation and disappointed judges this week as, once again, the talent leaves a lot of meat on the bone (if you know what I mean). That said, if you're a fan of the candy accouterment, this might just be the app ep for you. Talking points: Gang colors Desert of the side The judges lack of poker faces …

Sometimes, we are serious. I thought this was one of those times until I listened back to the ep. There are an unprecedented 3 songs broken into and we have an unprecedented 4 fuckin' garbage bags as contestants. Luckily, guest judge Neil Patrick Harris does not fail to deliver with pro-level shade. This episode is dedicated to my listeners. You fo…

What else would you expect from a rare two day long morning hour, multi-track, multi-take recording but absolute bullshit from our contestants. Get ready for your stomach to literally churn alongside mine. Learn about The Wizard and get that mayonnaise the way you really wanted it. It's Chapped! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spoti…

What else would you expect from a 5 month break but a brooding tangent on dark animation magic for a pastry, a special guest in the final judgement, and an egregious error when selecting the programing straight from the get go. Guess who's back? Shady's back. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

Everyone needs a friend in these "uncertain times." Have you ever considered an edible, corn-meal based buddy? Find out if your answer is yes in this seafood spectacular where the East Coast accent attempts are, dare we say, numerous. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

Update: This is the end of the latency issue episodes. We know this because they are recorded up to a month in advance. In this episode, we see the most anti-climatic end of the $50K Tournament of Chopped Champions. We have a life sized DMX, disgusting appetizer basket ingredients, and the most rapid hand motions we've ever seen. --- Send in a voic…

What cruel fate befalls our host. Just as a former employer comes forth as a subscriber, an unknown latency issue renders this episode borderline un-listenable. For the brave - a deep dive into Geodude lore and a special musical treat in the final moments of this treasure trove of comedy prompts. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spot…

What cruel fate brings a show I cooked up to quell my solitude, but a couples themed episode with the biggest spoiler yet: ICGZ is married to a woman. Listen as respected judges desecrate high quality pork and I make a crucial naming error. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

Perhaps the greatest portmanteau ever created - or at least as good as I'll ever accidentally conjure into existence. Cheesy puns flow like melted cheese this cheese themed episode, which is to say, not quickly. Let's dig in. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

Possibly the only time I should have allowed myself to up the volume just enough to understand how the heck these contestants' names are pronounced. Guess we'll never know. There's no way of knowing. One thing we do know, it's a Cake Battle, so you know it's going to be slow going. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/sho…

Boy, have I been on my own personal chopping block as of late. That is to say, I finished this episode 2 months ago and haven't done much since. I'm guessing this title alludes to a woman who will steal your woman as a competitor. Let's find out together. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message…

I spent so much time on finally adding intro and outro music I completely have deleted all memories of the episode. I think this is part one of "The Brady Abomoninations" --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chapped/message

Hubris is the name of the game for this episode, and pretty much every episode. I still haven't figured out who we have to thank - is it the editing room or the producers? Is there even a director? Which good god gives us such insight into these poor saps' follies? Whomever it is, a heartfelt gratitude for the schadenfreude of watching a dickhead f…

Everyone's favorite Christmastime treat, and, if I remember correctly, a mnemonic device one of these poor saps attempts to employ to get us to understand that her name really is what it is. Or is that totally off base? You know I can never catch what their names are. Chopped Season 40 - Episode 57 Chapped Season 1 - Episode 2 --- Send in a voice m…

Robertson County History Museum Overnight Investigation. Guests included Doogie Mcdougal from Tennessee Wraith Chasers, Joe Dimare, and Chili Childress. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chris-chappell/support

This is not a podcast. This is hard hitting, live action commentary on the most vicious bloodsport still televised - competitive cooking. It's a deep dive into some blasphemous content as we celebrate Ted Allen and that italian dessert favorite, Panda Cotta. Chopped - Season 40, Episode 66. Chapped - Episode 1 --- Send in a voice message: https://p…

This first episodic series finishes up at St. Albans Sanitarium in Rasden, VA. We had plent of activity and some spirits got too close for comfort.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chris-chappell/support

Episode 1 w/ guest Ethan Vincil 16 year old unique country southern rock vocal ability who is as humble as he is kind. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chris-chappell/support

Preview of all new Paranormal podcast After the Haunt.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/chris-chappell/support

This is one of our best episodes yet. Join local spicy boys Chase and Anthony as they compete to find the worst thing on earth, and play a new game that we would like to call, “Dungeons & Jared.” The hosts with the mosts: Anthony (“Chapped”) Chase (“Yams”) – http://www.instagram.com/chaseyams Podcast Edited by: Chase – Main Edit & Final Pass Chappe…

The boys are back! New year, new jokes, new equipment. Enjoy the new & improved audio quality as Anthony and Chase share an XXXL shirt and discuss the ridiculous first-world situations that can ruin their day and the value of grace. The hosts with the mosts: Anthony (“Chapped”) Chase (“Yams”) – http://www.instagram.com/chaseyams Podcast Edited by: …

The first CYP of 2018. Join wise (and humble) boys Chase and Anthony in a more serious episode, in which we discuss our previous jobs as cast and crew members and Anthony’s experience with a hectic chair fight. Divert your attention from your job, and hear us talk about ours! Your hosts for the evening: Anthony (“Chapped”) Chase (“Yams”) – http://w…

“Chapped Yams Podcast”: The podcast that will get your dad stuck at the top of a mountain. With the holiday season approaching, we get into the good ol’ Christmas spirit and talk about snow days, Bob Ross, embarrassing memories, and the true meaning of Christmas. Come get your biweekly dose of this all-natural, grass-fed, GMO-free, farm-to-table po…

This ain’t clickbait, boys and girls. Join local good boys Chase and Anthony as they dive into another episode full of improv rap battles, pretentious coffee tasting, stomach vacuums and bad Rocky impersonations. Your lovely hosts for the evening: Anthony (“Chapped”) Chase (“Yams”) – http://www.instagram.com/chaseyams Podcast Edited by: Chase – Mai…

Our third episode of the Chapped Yams Podcast! Can you believe we’re still making these? Join local degenerates, Chase and Anthony, as they discuss their Halloween antics, boiling iPhone chargers and partake in the “Laffy Taffy Extravaganza.” Your lovely hosts for the evening: Anthony (“Chapped”) Chase (“Yams”) – http://www.instagram.com/chaseyams …

RACE WALKING IS AN OLYMPIC SPORT, GUYS. WHAT THE HECK. Join local spicy boys Anthony and Chase as they discuss their “bouncy ball” approach to war and get into a heated debate over candy corn. Pretty serious stuff, guys. Your lovely hosts for the evening: Anthony (“Chapped”) Chase (“Yams”) – http://www.instagram.com/chaseyams Podcast Edited by: Cha…

Welcome to the first official episode of the Chapped Yams Podcast! Spend an hour with local spicy boys Anthony and Chase as they recount their awkward middle school past and Chase’s encounter with the Japanese mafia, and discuss one of the world’s most controversial questions. Come take a load off, and join us for a while! Your hosts are: Anthony (…