Jan Talen public
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You can lower the weariness, anxiety and depression that overwhelms your relationships. Each week Jan, a marriage and family therapist, talks through real life situations for being your best parent and spouse/partner. Keep your dream of being married forever while parenting your infants, toddlers, school age and teenagers. Jan teaches towards the DNA way of communicating that brings emotional balance alongside speaking, listening and connecting skills. This defends against the pain of divorc ...
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show series
 
Values are extremely valuable when it comes to understanding others. They are also very valuable when it comes to communicating as a parent and within our marriages. But, we have to start with defining a value, and then understanding that how we live out that value will also impact how others (kids, spouses/partners) build relationships with us. If…
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Happy Father's Day! Although, to be truthful, Dad's are needed everyday! And so, today, we talk with 3 dads...all with 3 kids...about the highs, lows, learnings and growth they've experienced since becoming dads. Learn from them, know that you are not alone in the challenges of fatherhood. And then, upgrade in whatever ways are best for you! Real d…
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On today’s show, Rachel Johnson Greer will talk with us about what to look for in all those online purchases. Her work in Amazon compliance and helping online sellers understand the manufacturing and distribution laws puts her in a unique position to inform us about how to discern a safe purchase from ones to be cautious about. Her book, “No Dead B…
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Welcome to the Us And Kids Podcast! We are talking today about how to create smooth transitions - for our kiddos, and for our selves. It's spring, moving into summer, and often those schedules around school, day care, social spaces and places create good times, and trying times. Our kiddos often don't understand going to sleep when it's still light…
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So, Mother’s Day has come and gone, again. How are you? Still so glad to be a mom or wondering how long you can hang in there with this mommy stuff? Did you entertain all day, were you ignored most of the day, or did the kids and others figure out how to honor you, in a way that was meaningful to you? On today’s show we’re talking about being yours…
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Yes, today’s show is for adults, (but still rated very G.) Why? Because staying in the adult-world after having a baby is very important to your identity as an adult, and your identity with your spouse. And those adult identities are also very important to the development of your kiddos as they grow up. Yep, I’m hinting at what happens in the room …
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On today’s show we are talking all about parenting, new babies, and pretzels. Pretzels can represent hugs, give a way to pause and think, distract from the depression and anxiety that can swamp new parents, and help couples remember to love and hug each other - and their kiddos. We will chat about 10 good ways to help you and your household reset w…
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Are you struggling with the noise, tears and screams in your house? A simple request turns into tempers, tantrums and trouble? And, you are supposed to stay calm, cool and collected? Really? Join us for this short, yet info-packed time of teaching about what self-control is, and how to build it into the fabric of your parenting, as well as your psy…
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Do you like to fight?...with your spouse or your kiddos? On the show today we are talking about those fights that seem to just recycle, over and over. Sometimes, it (seems) settled for years, or months - other times, “it” was settled - for maybe 15 minutes. And it’s sooo tiring, confusing, draining. Are these fights even finish-able? Listen in and …
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Married, with kiddos? What kind of reading are you doing - newsfeed, kids’ books, whatever is short and quick? Reading is a skill we would be troubled to be without. And, it is one of the most complex skills we need to learn. Relationships also require a lot of reading. And a lot of comprehending what we just read. Body language, tone of voice, loo…
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Tammi chats with us about how she knew her son (and family) needed more support - and how she pursued getting the right support to help Isaac reset his world view (that was influenced by Covid) so that peace could be a more normal part of interacting and being. Good work for a good win for Tammi, Phil and Isaac!…
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Finally - or fastly - 2021 is almost done! We are into our 3rd year of bringing you bi-weekly podcasts to help you be married forever while you enjoy parenting your kiddos together! So, today, we’re going to round out the year with just some pithy thoughts and sentences that make sense but don’t take long enough to each make a whole podcast. You kn…
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So it's December. Do you feel a little bit crazy? Like maybe the world is always spinning and you try to jump on, but tumble off, embarrassingly. Or maybe from time to time you secretly bumble and jump off. Or do you thrive under the chaos? Or does the chaos thrive inside of you - eating your brain, your sanity, yourself, and your relationships? We…
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Let me ask you, "Are you ready?" "For what??", you might ask. For learning about how to loosen up and lighten up, even in the midst of November and December. What do you think when you hear those words loosen up, lighten up? Do you just get angry, like, well, who has time for that? This day was made to help us find our lighter side while locking up…
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On today’s show, we're going to talk about napping. Now you can have all sorts of different emotional reactions around this, like, “Oh, I'd love to nap!”, or “They always nap way too long”, or “That kid who of mine does not know how to take a nap!” You can go all over the place with napping conversations. So today we're just going to talk mostly ab…
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Have you had a heavy heart this month? There are two intense life events that impact so many of us in October as it is both Breast Cancer and Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Listen in to how the grief that we can experience in these life events can be different and yet the same - as shared by personal stories. And then, be with your frie…
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On today’s show, we are going to be chatting with our special guest, Christi Gilbert. She is an awesome mom of 3, an education expert, and my oldest daughter. She and I are talking through her experience of parenting her son as she began to realize that some other expert input would be really wise. Hear her story and thought process as she worked t…
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On today’s show, we are doing something a little bit different. I’ve brought on a few guests to be on the show today but they aren’t just any guests - they are 3 of my grandkids. I told them they’d be allowed to ask me anything - so they did! And now, you get to listen in and hear our conversation together. These are random, unscripted, and unknown…
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On today’s show, we're talking about how to help your kids be successful. We think of it in terms of how to help your kids be gritty. How do you help them get along in life? So we're going to split this into two different thoughts. The first part of this podcast is about what's happening for you and with that adult relationship between you and your…
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On today’s show, we are gearing up to send our kiddos back to school or preschool, or perhaps just a more structured schedule for the day in the week. And we could easily be noticing some changes in our kiddos as well - maybe even in ourselves. Sometimes it can be hard to tell why our little ones are being a bit naughty and hard to distinguish if i…
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On today’s show, we are pulling together the last seven podcasts where we listed "10 Tips" and are integrating those top tips with key ideas from our top three podcasts. Those podcasts are about being bilingual with our love languages, the adjustments everyone in the family goes through when a new tiny, yet impactful sibling joins and how to live i…
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On today’s show, we are doing the last of our "10 tips" in our series. This is podcast 99 moving into podcast 100 and I wanted to talked about intimacy, as we have not covered this topic very much. Intimacy has lots of meanings, messes and moments that create all different memories. As we talk about intimacy, I'm talking less about close bodies and…
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On today’s show, we are going to talk about about 10 tips for playing as adults. So you might think at first, how is this different from playing as kids? If you revisit our previous episode you’ll remember that the kids play has more personal growth and brain development in it. Playing as an adult has a little bit of a different angle to it. It’s s…
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Forgiveness is messy, challenging and necessary. Often we believe that the hurt from "that person" will never leave me. We are scared and damaged for life because of what they did. We might believe that we will never be whole, worthy or valued because of their words, actions, opinions. This week’s podcast will help you get out of the painfulness of…
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On today’s show, we're going to do 10 tips about talking. We're going to borrow some from the corporate world and the neurophysiological world. We talk about speaking in our course but we’re going to take it a little differently and apply what we know from corporate studies of communication in groups and upper management and apply those to our own …
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On today’s show, we are talking about how do we listen well? What are some tips for helping me just listen a little better? Sometimes it's a little harder during the summer time because it's hot outside and we're tired. We often need a little bit more hydration and sometimes we just end up being up later and drinking more alcohol because there's mo…
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Kids: playing, making messes, being loud and noisy! Really it could just give us adults all a headache. Or could we relax as we realize how important play is for our bodies - and our brains. At any age! Listen in and have fun playing. It's the most important work of a kiddos and the ongoing crucial activity for us ...with kids!…
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So today we're going to start a series of 10 Tips. Our first topic will be about summer health. And then, the next 5 weeks we will include tips for playing - with kids and as adults, tips about intimacy, talking, and listening well. And - there's a contest using these tips as we close in on Episode 100! Listen in, look at the Usandkidspodcast Faceb…
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Today we're going to talk about the letter A. We're going to start by talking about anger and then add other A words that both lead away from anger in a negative way or in a more sad way and lead away from anger into a more healthy or appealing way. So first, we have to start by talking about anger. I talk often with my clients about the idea that …
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On today’s show, we are talking about how my marriage has lasted 42 years and one week. Last week was my 42nd anniversary to my husband Chip. We have known each other for 45 years and so I took a little walk back through history. I looked at it through the lens of our program that we use to help you guys called the Us...and Kids Communication Progr…
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I have a little announcement today. The date of this is podcast being released is the 42nd anniversary of my marriage to my husband, Chipper. You're right, usually we call him Chip. I get to call him Chipper. Anyways, I thought well, what happens if I take a little walk back in time and think about “how have we lasted this long?”. Maybe you think t…
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On today’s show, we are using the DNA method to explore empathy. We are going to need to Define our desires or a dream. And that means today my dream or my desire is being emotionally connected with my family and with other people in very kind ways. What is my N, my necessary skill? Today is going to be about empathy. And the A is, how are we going…
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On today’s show, our topic is all about using our imagination to build confidence. This is a timeless podcast because we whether we are adults and kids, we are always encountering new things. And we can either become scared and a little shaky or unsure of ourselves, losing our confidence or we can be confident of ourselves and what we are able to d…
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On today’s show, we're going to talk about being honest. Now, honesty can come in many forms, right? Honest to ourselves, honest with others, honest about our emotions. When you hear the word honest, or when someone says to you, "Oh come on, be honest!" how do you respond? Are there different levels of honesty? Because then, that begs the question …
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On today’s show, we’re going to talk about anxiety. Anxiety is, physiologically, a sense of overwhelming concern, or worry when there doesn't seem to be a good way to resolve a situation and even if it's resolved, there's a worry about what about next time? So it's a worry about things in the future and the unknown things that we don't have control…
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On today’s show, we're talking about, "How can I help?" Or, "How can I support?" So, we're going to work our way through the word SUPPORT in an acronym sort of way. This time we are going to look at each letter briefly from both: What if you're looking for support, what would you do?; And, if you're offering support, or being asked to support someo…
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It takes a lot of courage to stay married forever while you parent together and it also takes a lot of encouragement to do that. The DNA method of communication often talks about this need for having courage and that encouragement to plays an important role in helping someone build up their courage. We know this is worth the work; being married for…
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Courage...have you used yours all up?? Sometimes we have to “just do it” - and it doesn’t really matter if we feel courageous...we have to do it anyways. So, what components of courage did you use to make it through, even when you were totally out of courage?? And if you wanted to be more courageous, or help your kiddo be OK with change and adventu…
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On today’s show, we're going to talk about Easter. But, we're also going to fit that into our desires, and the skills that we need to achieve our desires. This is not a highly spiritual, Christian podcast in terms of that we're not going to talk all about the Jesus part of it. We're going to talk about the good human health part of it. We can make …
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On today’s show, we are going to talk about trauma. Not many of us like to think about it, but probably all of us have it. And trauma impacts families, it impacts marriages and impacts us as individuals. And yet I feel like it’s not very often talked about even though it often impacts how a family and a couple reacts and interacts with things. Toda…
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So today’s show, we are going to talk a little bit more about the DNA process. We’ve been talking a lot about marriages lately and when I wanted to do was say, okay, let’s pay attention to those kiddos. So we’re just going to talk a little bit about one of your hopes and dreams. If you’re listening to Us and Kids, you probably had a desire to have …
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Today I'm glad you joined us becausewe are tying together the last threepodcasts aboutupgrading your marriage so that it will last forever, while you also become more awesome parents taking care of your kids together. We've talked about the D: Defining your desires and values. Then we moved onto two other podcasts that talked about the N: Necessary…
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Today we are talking about the last three of the eight core or necessary pieces that we know to make the DNA in our marriage and our family life really strong and healthy. You and I both know our marriages are very unique. And even how our marriage was five years ago and how it is now also can be very different and looks very different. Its importa…
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Last week we looked at the values that we bring into our relationship and how those values build up the basic structure of our relationships with our kids or even with our spouses. So today we’re going to look a little bit more at the particulars that hold this structure together. This structure is in the particulars were going to talk about are im…
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In today’s show, we are focusing on building up the skills we need for helping our marriages and our families regardless of the messiness of life. Today we are going to talk about DNA and we are looking at DNA within your relationships, your marriage, and your family because that too is always going to be unique just to you and so we can’t make a c…
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On today’s show, we are diving into shame and responsibility and it’s going to apply both to you as a husband or wife, and how you interact with your kiddos. We’re going to start by talking about yourself because so much of our parenting and interactions in our marriage can come from a place of shame and that can be somewhat contagious. The podcast…
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On today’s show, we are wrapping up the last part of a 5 part series we started in January about how to stay married forever while you parent together - not one or the other. Today we are talking about KISSes. Of course, there has to be kisses! Eskimo and butterfly kisses, as well as I love you - oooh! kisses. But when there is stress and headaches…
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