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Ep. 182 (Best of) Wanting Others To Be Happy

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Content provided by Heidi Benjaminsen Coaching and Heidi Benjaminsen. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Heidi Benjaminsen Coaching and Heidi Benjaminsen or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://ro.player.fm/legal.

It sounds like a kind desire to have towards others - wanting them to be happy and feel good.

This desire works... until it doesn't and this thought becomes toxic and creates stress (in us and them).

And disconnects us from the people we love most who experience human and negative experiences.

When others are sad, grieving, disappointed and more, they don't need us to tell them we really want them to be happy. (If we do this, they don't want to be around us - which is usually the opposite of what we want.)

They need us to witness their negativity, they need validation and support.

They don't need "fixing", which is what it feels like (unintentionally!) when we want everyone to be happy.

Ironically, as we sit with others in their negativity, they naturally feel "better" because they feel seen and loved.

Which is what we all want anyway.

Listen to episode 182 to hear the reasons why we don't want people to be happy all the time and how to create more humanity and love in our relationships.

  continue reading

190 episoade

Artwork
iconDistribuie
 
Manage episode 420942854 series 2976156
Content provided by Heidi Benjaminsen Coaching and Heidi Benjaminsen. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Heidi Benjaminsen Coaching and Heidi Benjaminsen or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://ro.player.fm/legal.

It sounds like a kind desire to have towards others - wanting them to be happy and feel good.

This desire works... until it doesn't and this thought becomes toxic and creates stress (in us and them).

And disconnects us from the people we love most who experience human and negative experiences.

When others are sad, grieving, disappointed and more, they don't need us to tell them we really want them to be happy. (If we do this, they don't want to be around us - which is usually the opposite of what we want.)

They need us to witness their negativity, they need validation and support.

They don't need "fixing", which is what it feels like (unintentionally!) when we want everyone to be happy.

Ironically, as we sit with others in their negativity, they naturally feel "better" because they feel seen and loved.

Which is what we all want anyway.

Listen to episode 182 to hear the reasons why we don't want people to be happy all the time and how to create more humanity and love in our relationships.

  continue reading

190 episoade

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