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Fire the Canon

Rachel, Jackie, Bekah

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Prefer your books in comedy form, but still want to sound smart at parties? We got you. Discover the hilarity hidden in the classics with new episodes every other Thursday.
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to all the boys from the internet who fooled us over once, twice, and way too many times! just a podcast about navigating through the confusing world of modern dating and some two cents from this firecracker of a smol Asian bean ✌️ Support this podcast by following it on Spotify, Apple Music & any other platforms you are listening to this on! You can also follow me at @21gramsofmay on Instagram and email anything to toalltheboysfromtheinternet@gmail.com
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Hello, their folks, my name is Xudus(X); this will be a podcast that will have myself and my best bud Ricky talking about our opinions on random topics. Come check us out, and please give any feedback so we can improve our podcast. Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/xrnovelty/support
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We're back with the second half of our over-the-top bio of EAP! Listen in for the story of Edgar's adulthood, complete with choleric escapades, omens from outer space, a cringeworthy misplaced accusation of plagiarism, a new love (now 100% child-free!) and a mysterious death followed by a funeral shorter than the song "Get Ur Freak On" by Missy Ell…
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Grab your raven, tuck your buddy’s heart under a floorboard, pour yourself a glass of Amontillado, and join us as we talk about the first half-ish of the life of Edgar Allan Poe, a man who didn’t ask to be born. It’s time to start warming up for spooky season 2025, and what better way than learning about one of America’s original Goths? Jackie goes…
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(Happy Thursday! That’s right, it’s Thursday. Don’t check.) Wow! A podcast! That’s the feeling you should get from this episode. Y’all… those crazy Athenian kids are still stuck in the dang woods. Will Puck, Oberon, and Titania continue messing with the humans and each other? Will Bottom regain his human form? Will the love triangles ever get resol…
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We’re back, with Shakespeare’s comedy classic, A Midsummer Night’s Dream! Basically, four young Athenians with romance problems wander into the woods and get messed with by a bunch of fairies - you know the drill. It’s a good time, you’ll love it. (Fun fact: Jackie once acted in this play! Ten imaginary points if you guess as which character.) Jack…
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This is a preview for our special Patreon bonus in which Rachel, Bekah, and returning guest Jess Owens (@saidbyjess) get together and talk tropes, baby. Which ones win? Which ones lose? Which ones have you never ever heard of before and maybe wish you could forget? We've got the deets. Join us on patreon.com/firethecanon to access full bonus episod…
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Well, well, well! We're back after a long hiatus in the middle of a pretty short book due to vacations of various sorts. For example, Jackie took a vacation to Italy (listen for an amazing story of being a dumb American), AND a vacation from being healthy by immediately getting Covid upon her return! But now we're all healthy and thriving, and Mrs.…
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Please join us as we read the first half of Virginia Woolf’s modernist masterpiece, Mrs. Dalloway! Taking place on a single day in mid-June 1923, the book takes us in and out of the minds of our two main characters, society housewife Clarissa Dalloway (who is throwing a party), and World War One veteran Septimus Warren Smith (who is having some ext…
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Join us as we delve into the life of Virginia Woolf, a woman who was many things, chiefly among them a writer! Despite Jackie promising to make this the most depressing author bio episode of all time, Rachel and Bekah refuse to let it happen. There's a lot of laughter, but also some almost-tears, and some hard topics, but it's worth it. Rachel reve…
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Stop! We see your eyeballs getting ready to dart away to something more fun. Dart 'em back here. This is the most fun you'll have hearing about race and racism since... ever, maybe! We know the bar is low, but still. Listen along to the original opening to our first Charlie and the Chocolate Factory episode, which immediately derailed into racial t…
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The gang finishes out the tale of ol' C-Bucks and the maniacal chocolate man in spectacular fashion - late, but not that late! Thanks for the endless patience of our many adoring fans. We would never turn you into marshmallows, even if that tube DID go to the marshmallow room. Jackie fucks up her audio, but doesn't know it yet (don't worry, she fix…
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Quick! What has 14 legs, one bed, and half a potato? Why, the Bucket family, of course! Join the gang as we cover the first half of Roodle Doodle's classic, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. You all know how the story goes, but you haven't heard it told by us. Rachel doxxes herself. Bekah learns about the Wonka-related scandal of the year. Jackie …
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She's back! University of Chicago professor, historian, and award-winning novelist Ada Palmer joins Rachel and Jackie for a conversation about the life and times of Niccolo Machiavelli, a fascinating guy who lived through fascinating times. Learn all about how his name gets an undeservedly bad rap, the trials and tribulations that led to the writin…
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Happy March, everyone! For our Patreon bonus, we thought we'd try something new: The Reading Corner! Jackie and Rachel have a friendly chit chat about whatever books we're currently reading. Maybe it will become a recurring feature? It all depends on what you like, and what Jackie likes. It doesn't matter at all what Rachel likes. For the full epis…
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The patrons battled it out in honor of the upcoming Ides of March, and in the struggle between The Art of War and The Prince, let's just say The Art of War got Caesar'd. It's like getting Punk'd, but instead of meeting Ashton Kutcher you die and get a salad named after you. Win/win? Buckle up as the gang guides you through the world's second most p…
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In preparation for our upcoming Charlie and the Chocolate Factory miniseries, we got the gang together to learn about the absolutely absurd life of Roald Dahl. Best-known for his children’s books, Dahl also wrote some very weird, pervy adult stories. Before he became a writer, he worked for an oil company in Africa (yes…… we know.), flew warplanes …
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Rodney has some stories about the infamous upstairs bathrooms at Barleys. Maybe you have your own, winkwink. If you have any story about working the tip industry, tell me! Follow this link to my speakpipe... I might just share it with the world! https://www.speakpipe.com/account/settings/widget#De către ammiknight
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Don’t say we never put our stellar reputations on the line for you! Joining us this week is our friend Jacob Waller (find him on YouTube as Big Yellow Praxis), who has recently fallen down the rabbit hole of a (potentially correct???) anti-Stratfordian theory (notably NOT a conspiracy theory). Jacob lays out the case for, conservatively, a HUGE AMO…
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Ahoy for the last time, me hearties! In this episode we cover Moby Dick from chapter 102 until the bitter, watery end. Ishmael finally reveals why Captain Ahab is so obsessed with Moby Dick, we finally discover the fate of pretty much the entire crew of the Pequod, and Moby Dick finally deigns to grace the page. Jackie does her Bob Dylan impression…
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This week, we're sharing part 2 of Jackie and Bekah reading one-star reviews of their favorite books to each other. Jackie comes at Bekah with the harshest criticisms of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice available on Goodreads. To hear the full episode, join our Patreon! Patreon.com/firethecanon. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★…
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Got a crazy, funny or wild ass story about the tipping industry you wanna share with the world? Leave me a message and I just might be able to help with that. Click the link below and start your tale! https://www.speakpipe.com/account/settings/widget Please rate and subscribe! Produced and edited by Ammi Knight for Lone Wolf Productions Music by Br…
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This week, we're joined by a very special guest: Nikita! Jackie handpicked her to co-host this episode because Nikita is funny, despite not being a man. We read and discussed the fourth of Charles Dickens' five Christmas Books so you don't have to, and you can go ahead and thank us for that. Rachel's mom tells her she doesn't deserve any presents. …
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In the spirit of the holidays, which some call the holiday spirit, this week we're re-releasing an old favorite from 2021: Agatha Christie's "Hercule Poirot's Christmas". Rejoin the original gang for a hilarious journey through a Christmas mystery (Christery). If you're anything like Jackie, the mystery will seem as fresh and new as it did two year…
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Ahoy! Welcome back to the podcast. In this episode, we cover chapters 71-101 of Moby Dick, and we come away with less whale knowledge than we started. Ishmael and Queequeg are wedded (again), a whale gets killed, ominous doings are done, etc., etc. Jackie is wrongfully accused of a crime, and rightfully admits to a crime. Rachel is wrongfully accus…
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We're back with another rousing look into the sleeping mind of Stephen, who really wants to know if you'd rather hold someone, or someone holds you, in bed, and there's another figure as well. Rachel wants to know if people like these episodes, so please tell us if you do, and say nothing if you don't. Join our Patreon to hear the full episode and …
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Ahoy, y’all! We’re back and we’re covering chapters 46 through 70 of Moby Dick. Sorry we were gone so long; Jackie was planning her annual Halloween party (that’s why we were gone, not Rachel’s wedding or bar exam study). In this part, Ishmael tells us the only good thing about Tahiti, and the Pequod boys finally have an interaction with a whale (s…
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Listen to me call my friends and have them tell me their paranormal experiences working in some creepy Knoxville joints. It's a Halloween treat from me to you! To leave a voicemail and tell your own tale, follow this link to my speakpipe... I might just share it with the world! https://www.speakpipe.com/account/settings/widget#…
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Hey! Here's David's Insta link, check out how talented he is! https://www.instagram.com/davidcainart/ And if You have a tale to tell, hit this link and tell it to me. Maybe I'll share it with the world. https://www.speakpipe.com/account/settings/widget# Thanks for listening in!De către ammiknight
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Happy Monday! Are we late from last week, or early this week? Who knows. Look, we aren't JUST telling you what happens in chapters 26 through 45 of Moby Dick this week. We're also inviting you to a party that is DEFINITELY NOT A WEIRD SEX THING, explaining how to make bathtub crank, and telling you which apartments don't have glory holes in them. W…
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We're back with the first episode of our series on the incomparable, the amazing, the VERY VERY LONG classic novel Moby Dick! Experience Herman Melville's classic boy-meets-whale tale as neither you nor anyone else has ever experienced it before. Rachel finally has some technical difficulties. Bekah tries a new dental procedure she just learned abo…
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We go deep into Knoxville in the 90's with a couple of chefs. To leave a voicemail and tell your own tale, follow this link to my speakpipe... I might just share it with the world! https://www.speakpipe.com/account/settings/widget#De către ammiknight
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Welcome to the first episode! Spend some time getting to know the mother of Market Square. To leave a voicemail and tell your own tale, follow this link to my speakpipe... I might just share it with the world! https://www.speakpipe.com/account/settings/widget#De către ammiknight
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Happy Thursday, everyone! This week we have a Patreon bonus preview for you all, in which Bekah and Jackie take turns reading each other one-star reviews of each other's favorite books. This week, Bekah tries Jackie's patience with the words of some of the world's smartest book reviewers. We talk confusing feelings and even more confused grammar by…
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This week we bring you another of Jackie's favorite type of episode: author bios! Even more exciting, we have a MAN joining us, so you can rest assured that this episode will contain about 33% less crying than usual. Even MORE exciting, that man is British, so you KNOW there's absolutely no chance things are going to get overly emotional. Which is …
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Happy Thursday! This week Rachel, Jackie, and Bekah wrap up Pride Month with a bang. The gang keeps it lesbian and discuss the life and times (what little is known about them) of Sappho, the Ancient Greek "Poetess" whose works have survived for nearly 2500 years and are still being discovered and discussed. She was also probably at least somewhat i…
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Hi, lovely patrons! As our thank you for your support this month, we bring you the action-packed, hijinks-filled tale of Theo's role-playing game with Chat GPT as the Dungeon Master. Will Theo prevail in his goal of defeating a ridiculous monster with a ridiculous weapon of his own choice? Listen and find out, maybe! The first 5 or so minutes are f…
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The original gang is back! Why? Because Theo needs advice. Not just any advice - the oldest advice in the world. That’s right - this week we’re discussing The Wisdom of Ptah-Hotep, a “book” of “advice” from Ptah-Hotep, vizier of Pharaoh Isesi, the last ruler of the Fifth Dynasty of Egypt. Theo has a suggestion for how we can avoid fixing the health…
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This week, we're coming at you with another FANTASTIC author interview, this time with the brilliant and wonderfully unusual Frances Hardinge, the award-winning author of "A Face Like Glass", "Cuckoo Song", "The Lie Tree", "Deeplight", and, most recently, "Unraveller". Her books are, to use her own words, "fairly dark and invariably strange". A chi…
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We wrap up the second half of Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-Five, and things actually get pretty real! Jackie isn't cut out for monogamy. Bekah schools an alien race on ableism. Rachel wants to normalize pooping in the dark with an electric guitar. So it goes! CONTENT WARNINGS: Sexual language, violence, trauma/PTSD, racism, sexism ★ Support this …
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