The Conversation Starter Cards That Can Replace Every Social Skills Book Ever Written

The Social Skills Doctor Podcast

Imagine for a moment, life without awkward silences or stilted conversations because you didn't know what to say. Imagine instead dates and dinner parties where the conversation flows like the wine. In fact, imagine starting a conversation anywhere from work with colleagues, to a party or networking event, and you just know how to make it work.

Welcome to a new podcast episode from the social skills doctor with me Richard gray where we will be going to the holy grail every shy or socially challenged person has been looking for since the dawn of the human race when our survival depended on connecting and being part of a tribe – the bestowment of a near instant 500% increase in social intelligence and skills through the medium of some very unique conversation cards.

In modern society we don't need to connect with others and have friend networks to survive. We can go to work, do our thing, stop at the supermarket on the way home and buy dinner for one. Rince and repeat. But it can be a cold and souless life to be caught up in such a spiral, lurking in the shadows while others bathe in the warmth of human connection and friendship.

What does this have to do with conversation cards?

Until now, conversation cards have played no part in helping the socially shy and communication challenged person to become an accomplished conversationalist. What they HAVE been good at is enhancing social interactions by providing thought-provoking questions, prompts, or topics designed to spark fun or engaging discussions.

But thats as far as it went - until now...

Essential Features Of Conversation Cards

For those of you who may not have tried conversation cards before, lets do a quick breakdown of their benefits:

1. Breaking the Ice: Initiating conversations can sometimes feel awkward or challenging, especially when meeting new people or in unfamiliar situations. Conversation starter cards can provide an easy way to break the ice and begin interesting discussions.
2. Creating Connections: These are built through discovering shared experiences and mutual interests. Conversation cards can act like a springboard to finding these connection points through questions that encourage participants to open up with information, personal anecdotes, opinions, beliefs and values.
3. Encouraging Active Listening: In today's seven second society, active listening has become increasingly rare. Conversation cards encourage the return of this skill through the unspoken contract of one person asking a question and then giving the respect of listening while the other person answers.
4. Adding Fun and Laughter: Organising a dinner party or date night etc. can cause anxiety. What if the conversation is awkward or stilted? Alcohol has long been used as a social lubricant but conversation starter cards can be equally as effective in providing a safety net of entertaining or thought-provoking talking points.

This all sounds very nice right? Having fun, learning things about the other person, and enjoying being listened to. Not having to worry about an awkward silence because you can just pull out the next card. But what if you're not a natural conversationalist? A question can get an interaction started but after that you're on your own.

The cards cannot instill you with the ability to know exactly what to say next after the other person has finished answering. The art of knowing what to say or ask next comes through identifying the most relevant words the other person is using, and what conversational level they have gone to with their answer.

But what if such conversation cards did exist that had been designed to train you in the art of keeping the conversation going, and meeting the other person on their wavelength so that connections were much more likely to occur?

An Evolutionary Leap In Conversation Starter Cards

We have discussed the benefits of conversation cards, but there are also a few essential features that all cards should have, then there is a a feature you never knew you needed, that only conversation craft cards have. Together these features will guarantee you have a set of cards that can replace every social skills book ever published.

Feature 1 - diverse topics. A good set of conversation cards will cover a wide range of subjects. With conversation craft cards there are one hundred questions covering the ten most common topics that come up in nearly all conversations.
Feature 2 - thought provoking. It should be a fundemental feature of any conversation cards that the questions are not only diverse, but fire the imagination. For example, you could ask someone how well they get on with their siblings. Or! you could ask what they would do to their siblings given total anonymity and access to a cloak of invisibility.
My imagination is running riot even as I think about that question. It may just be time to take my brain for some therapy, anyway, moving quickly on...
Feature 3 - player numbers. Thats an odd feature to highlight I hear you say. Surely youy need two or more people to play? Not with conversation craft cards. Because there is a much deeper strategy involved that means you can simply memorise a few of your favourite questions then ask them to anyone without anyone knowing you are playing a bigger game.

The forth feature is the one that will really blow your mind because it achieves far more effectively, and in a fraction of the time, what hundreds of social skills books have attempted and often failed to do. That feature is social intelligence, and the benefit of it is massively increased social skills. This feature and benefit is unique to conversation craft.

How to Play Conversation Craft

In general there are five conversational levels, and it's vital to know these levels if you want to develop higher social intelligence and deliberately connect with others. These levels are:
1. The surface level

2. The information level

3. The opinions level

4. The feelings level

5. The relationship level
You could make an argument for more levels if you liked, but its not necessary for developing your conversation skills and connecting with others like a champion. Lets now do a fast and dirty overview of these levels using our previous sibling example question.

If the other person were to tell you what they would do to their sibling then they are at the information level. If they are telling you the best way to do what they would do, then they are at the opinions level. If they are telling you how good it would make them feel to do what they would do, then they are going to the feelings level.
Now imagine they are at the feelings level but you are responding at the surface or information level. Subconsciously they would probably feel like they weren't really clicking with you. At a conscious level they may have thoughts that you are holding back, while they are being free with their opinions and feelings.

You may never have been aware of this communication mismatch before but you can bet they are not feeling relaxed with you. They don't feel relaxed because trust isn't being established through mutual sharing. You may still make a friend if you have shared interests, but until you start talking at the same level, it will never become a strong friendship or more.
This is such an easy problem to overcome with the conversation craft cards because they highlight what level each question is on and train you to think in terms of matching, and advancing the conversation to the next level. With some repeated use of the cards you will quickly develop muscle memory for the levels and become a much higher level conversationalist as a result.
Now thats something no other conversation cards can do for you, and because of this unique training dimension, conversation craft are also the only cards that can be used as a single player - should you not wish the other person to know you are discreetly developing your social skills.

Getting the Most Out of Your Conversation Cards

To truly make the most out of your conversation cards, it's important to approach their use with flexibility and adaptability. Here are some tips on how to maximize their effectiveness:

• Stay flexible: While conversation starter cards provide a great springboard for discussions, the thrill of the ride can be the unexpected directions that conversation may flow in. Allow room for spontaneity or use the training provided to guide the other person through the levels.
• Encourage everyone to join in: Perhaps one of the more important, yet underated, aspects of using conversation starter cards is that nobody dominates and nobody is left in the shadows. Many of the conversation craft questions are hypothetical and light in tone, ensuring nobody is put on the spot or made to feel awkward.
• Start connecting: Conversation starter cards are designed to keep conversations flowing, fun, a little bit revealing, and awkward silence free. But with the powerful combination of your active listening, and conversation crafts levels training, you will benefit from a new super power to make connections on first dates, or with anyone you like.

The conversation craft cards are designed to be the facilitators of human connection, but it is the simple yet powerful conversation levels awareness they develop, and instil in your mind that will enable you to spread your social wings and unleash the conversational potential of each card once the question has been asked.

Thanks for listening, and until next time do one thing this week to develop your social skills such as going to the social skills doctor dot com website to learn more about the conversation craft cards, take care and bye for now.